On why this photo is deceiving

This is not the most peaceful baby in the world; but you wouldn't know it from the picture I uploaded here, taken this morning in her royal onesie (LOVE etsy.com). I had colic from birth to 9 months, and my mom said she always wished that I'd have a colicky daughter so I'd know what it was like. Well, THANKS MOM. Here she is. Fussina Fusserman, as I call her (I called her that at the doctor's office yesterday, cracked the nurse up). She's rarely pleased, rarely peaceful. She does sleep in 4 hour stretches at night thank goodness. But during the day, it's pretty much a fuss-fest at our house. And when she cries, Nick does a "fake" sympathy cry (which is actually pretty funny, though after about an hour of them both going at it, I'm done). Anyway, I think it's funny - all of us new moms work hard to capture the photos of the good times, the happy moments. The reality of motherhood is this (and not just for me in my post-partum depression-y haze): Your hair is dirty, you have no makeup on, your clothes smell like stale breastmilk or formula, you have not slept in god knows how long, and you'd secretly (or not-so-secretly) like to run away. Far away. But you don't, because you love these munchkins. And there are, after all, moments like these, deceptive as they may be.
p.s. Once again I look at this photo and it's like looking back at Nick two years ago. These two just look so alike to me!

Nick-speak

Nick is talking up a storm these days! And his little Nick-speak is adorable. Here are some of his words and phrases, decoded.

1. "Ooh ba doo" means "Open the door"
2. "Dung-go" means "bicycle"
3. "Sheesh" can mean cheese or shoes, depending on the context. Sometimes you only know by where he leads you when he takes you by the hand - to the back door, or to the refrigerator.
4. "Ah da mama" means "Wait for mama" which is what he learned when he had to go up and down the stairs with me super slowly after my c-section.
5. "Burts" means balloons and berries. Or anything round and mostly red.
6. "A-jeech" means blanket.
7. "Deetz" means fix, like as in "Dada deetz choo choo" for "Dada fix my train that I tore apart AGAIN for the fifth time today."
8. "Ni ni" is "goodnight."
9. "Goo-ma" is "Grandma" (and "Boo-ma" is "Booma" or pacifier - these two are close so again, context is key).

There are so many more, I'll try to add them when time allows.

Seeing a resemblance

Check out Nick at one month old:

Kinda looks like his sis here, doesn't he?

Happy 1st month, Zoe!

My favorite photos from this week:

Where you find it

I am working hard to find happiness and be in the moment, for my kids. They deserve a happy mommy, and the bottom line is that my happiness rests in my hands. Evidence of my efforts can be found here, in this shot of my little month-old girl who has a terrible case of baby acne but is still beautiful nonetheless ...
And in my little two year-old man who had his first easter egg hunt courtesy of Grammie and Grandpa last week, practice for his first 'real' egg hunt tomorrow at Auntie K's Easter Bash ...


So that I don't look back in 20 years and think, wow, I shouldn't have reveled in what was wrong - I should have basked in what was right - I am working to savor these moments that can't ever be relived. As I realized while watching Nick hunt for eggs, happiness is where you find it. Sometimes it's as simple as that.