Starfish

I have always loved starfish. They symbolize for me a certain strength and resilience, but also peace and tranquility. If you cut off one of their legs, it grows back. But they are not aggressors. They don't seek conflict but if it comes to them, they persist and overcome even the harshest physical challenge.

I have had to be a starfish in my life. I have faced many challenges in my 35 years and had to find ways to overcome, persist, and survive. I really feel like the past few months wounded me physically and emotionally, but my legs are regrowing. I have seen glimmers of hope, glimpses of a life better lived. I have smiled every day. I have stopped crying. I have prayed for wisdom and courage. And for peace. And for the ability to do with grace what needs to be done in my life. Like a starfish.

I wouldn't say I am without fear, but I would say I feel better able to face the fears I have.

This week Dave was diagnosed with parasomnia, which is a sleep disorder where you act out your nightmares. Scientists really don't know what causes the base problem; but in essence if you have this, when you're in REM sleep you don't have the normal paralysis that keeps you from sleepwalking and sleeptalking. So if you dream that you're being attacked, you actually attack back. It can be very dangerous to those who sleep in the bed with the afflicted person. He had an attack of this two weeks ago and scared me (and Nick) half to death. He's having an MRI and EEG next week to make sure there aren't other neurological problems underlying this one (there tend to be, apparently) and then he'll have to be on medication. Or sleep in another room. Life just keeps on getting more ... interesting around here.

I'll continue updates every so often and thank you for checking in on me!